The Magic of the Messy Middle

I’m a bit lazy, always have been. I usually asked why someone did what they did the way they did it because I always wanted to find the easier way to do the thing or even determine if it was a thing that needed doing at all. I also liked to put things together that didn’t go together normally and often this helped solve some of the problems I ran into when I was trying to make things simpler.

The problem with trying to make things simpler is that you run through this territory in the middle of starting with the idea of making things simpler and the superior end result that looks from the outside (and sometimes from the inside of it) Just Awful, and a Huge Mess. This is usually the territory into which most mere mortals dare not enter. But I would run headlong into it, passionately, blindly, until I got to the exact center where I would have my “what the fuck am I doing” along with the “oh shit, I’ve screwed everything up” moments. It was consistently getting to this point where one could either give up in defeat and go trudging back through the shit, head hanging, back to where you started. OR one could carry on and keep pushing through until you found a decent answer. Sometimes it took a lot of tries. Sometimes it didn’t. But it was always kind of cool when you did.

I think oftentimes people either see that middle territory as scary or too daunting to even consider venturing into. The thing is, that Messy Middle is pretty awesome if you can ride above the self-doubt and self-flagellation. It’s the Land of Possibilities. It’s where you can make incredible things happen.

When I get a little scared of that Messy Middle, I try to reframe it as the Laboratory where I can test ideas, discover new solutions, and just play. It only seems scary because it’s unfamiliar. I remind my monkey brain who is focused only on survival that it’s okay. Just because it’s new doesn’t automatically mean it’s a threat. It could be the next new treat. Once reassured, usually monkey brain settles down to a level of “be careful” not full out terror and “we’re going to die!” which I can manage.

I have started to use Mo Gawdat’s suggestion of telling monkey brain that I don’t like a particular thought and to bring me a different one, a more positive one. I’m often quite surprised at how compliant monkey brain is with this.

This brain spew certainly didn’t go the direction I thought it would lol. But I’m happy with where I ended up, so we’ll go with this.

I’m finally making friends with my emotional closet monsters, making conscious choices about who I want to be, and having a whale of a time doing it.

Awkwardly Onward! Rowr.